Will dating a younger man work?
Women who date younger men are intrigued by curiosity, while men who date younger women are simply looking for experience. If you've ever felt a spark with a younger man but thought it would never work. This may be because most films with a love story between an older woman and a young man don't end well except that it's not necessarily true.
AGE DOESN'T MATTER IF THERE'S LOVE...
For example, French President Emmanuel Macron and his wife Brigitte for 12 years, who is 25 years older than her husband. Or Nick Offerman, 49, and Megan Mullally, 60, who recount their marriage in their book, The Greatest Love Story Ever Told. More recently there are also Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra who seem to be very happy.
According to a study by the dating site EliteSingles, a very large proportion of their male users between 20 and 29 years old are looking for an older woman with a gap of about 11 years.
Psychologist Paulette Sherman, says that as in any relationship, success depends on what the people involved bring. Based on life experience, a 50-year-old man may be younger in spirit than a 25-year-old man who will be more mature. It is therefore better to make up your own mind about the person rather than relying on your age.
The experience of having a younger man at our side can sometimes make us feel invincible, as if the world belongs to us and life is still ahead of us. Someone who is less attached to family obligations and the demands of a particular way of life can give a sense of freedom.
Research on dating applications reveals that women over fifty tend to seek out younger men, partly because they assume that this age group will be more open to new experiences.
The recklessness of a man who has not had all of these routines and gruelling life experiences may seem appealing.
Your journey being more developed and more accomplished than your partner, he will surely admire you for what you have accomplished and be impressed with your journey.
Your career, your children, your travels will all have value to him, you can be proud of it and a man who is still in the early stages of adulthood will be dazzled by all this and will even be inspired by a woman who has succeeded while older men will feel competitive with her.
You are mature, you have grown up, they are looking for a woman who does not make caprices for childish subjects of excessive jealousy scenes, you have acquired wisdom about life, love etc...
Often young men with strong ambition cannot find a woman of their age with the same position, which is why they seek the approval of a woman who has already accomplished things to reassure them, to guide them.
RECONNECTING WITH TECHNOLOGY
Indeed, depending on the generation and the age gap, it is possible that certain aspects of the relationship, which for him also involve technology, SMS etc., may escape you. It would seem that men prefer to send text messages rather than call, which may not be the case for you as you are less familiar with the emojis jargon.
Again if you feel the gap is widening it is necessary to talk about your communication preferences, this will avoid frustration.
They may also feel intimidated by the place you occupy in society, in life, a less confident man who is just beginning to build his own path will not always be so in love with your journey. This can give way to difficulties with your professional commitments or a blended family reunion that requires spending time with your ex-husband for example.
As in all relationships communication is essential, expressing feelings and insecurities can be very helpful. Both people need to recognise that they do not have the same background, the same level of success in life.
The vision of power, of dependence on each other can also be different depending on the age of the people.
Disagreements regarding children, if you are close to menopause and he is far from envisaging a child or on the contrary he wants a child at all costs. This can create constraints, if you do not want to have other children or you are already menopausal and you cannot offer him something as essential as a child.
That's why it's usually very important to talk about this kind of subject when you feel the relationship is getting serious so that there are no surprises.
Even though tolerance and prejudice have come a long way, the relationship between an older woman and a young man will be stigmatised. Don't be surprised if you find yourself answering unwelcome questions, jokes, comments from people who do not approve of your choices or may even be jealous.
Relatives may also disapprove of you and this will cause stress and tension in your relationship but you need to face it and be united because you are the only one who knows what you want for yourself.
Find the right strategy for you to deal with criticism from family members or strangers who do not understand you. This will make you stronger as a couple, not giving in to social pressure and living as you decide is the first step to having a happy and healthy relationship. Moreover, it will advance the debates and mentalities on this subject if your couple resists all these judgements and trials imposed by society.
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Written by: Lisa Lambert, Staff Writer
- Romance & Dating
- 11 Mar, 2020
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